What's It Gonna Be?

"F%#* it.  I'm staying.  Sasha"

This was the message my husband received from me during my recent trip to the Balkans.

Unfortunately, he had not seen the previous message yet—the one detailing my ordeal. Unfortunate timing…poor guy.

I began the trip in Croatia with a group of like-minded travelers I had met online.  The idea was to traipse around the coast of Croatia, Slovenia, and Montenegro, finding accommodations much in the way I prefer--hostels, locals, etc...

However, the itinerary was not panning out in the manner I had expected.  Without rehashing the details, let's just say I wasn't as happy as I would have expected on such a trip due to the rushed schedule.  I was aware that it was not clicking.  It didn't feel like 'me'. 

So there I was, poised on the verge of departing Kotor.  We were all packed and set to conquer our next destination.  My heart was beating so hard.  I felt like everyone in the hostel lobby could hear it.  I glanced nervously at the local owners, trying to gauge if they could help me find my own way back up the coast alone.  My brain was ticking off pros and cons, rapid-fire.  We wound our way back through the old city to our rental car near the sea.

I swung around and drank in the breathtaking city with a huge gulp.  The car trunk popped open.  I carefully grabbed my coat and stepped back from the group.  

In that moment, I decided.  "I can't leave," I said timidly.



The walk back to the hostel through the city was like a roller coaster.  My heart was still pounding and my head was spinning, but my smile almost knocked over the people passing by.  The rest of the trip was indescribably magical.

Why do I rewind specifically to this moment to share with you all?  

Because I made a choice.  It was that simple.  This one was an especially weighty choice, but it was still as easy as me picking what would make me happy and what felt best.    

I've read many, many books on improving yourself, cultivating inspiration, and finding your purpose.  While I wholeheartedly believe you should devour these texts for yourself, I can also give you the Cliffs Notes version in one sentence…ready?

You have a choice.

If you're not happy…if you're not meeting your goals…if you don't have the job you want…if, if, IF...you have a choice.





I've run into some backlash on this when I pose it to friends, but it can almost always come back to a simple decision point.  

Are you not able to find time to exercise?  You have a choice to wake up earlier, right?  I didn't say it was an easy choice.  But you have that power, right?

Do you not have enough money to travel?  You have a choice to spend $50 at Starbucks each month ($600/year) or keep cable for your TV (possibly $100/month or $1200/year!), right?


Do you become agitated throughout your day by the people around you, or traffic, or work?  You have the choice to see the happy or the crappy, right?  You can remove yourself from a group of people, or find another route to work…or, or, OR...

Do conversations with your spouse turn into biting, snippy comments and sour tones?  You have the choice to respond in a neutral or loving way, right?  You have the choice to leave the room, right?  You even have the choice to stop talking and kiss them instead, right? (One of my favorites!)

Heck, I can even choose to think about the day we lost my doggie, and bring myself to tears. Or I can choose to remember that romantic vacation to Mexico in 2007 with my husband, and be transported back to our casita.

I can choose to sit and watch another episode of House Hunters International on HGTV…or I can write my post for this week…or I can take care of the laundry that's been haunting me for a few days…or or OR…  If I get to Friday and realize, “Crap, I don't have something written!”  I know that was my choice.  And here's the awesome part: I can choose how to change that in the future.

If I don't like my job, I can decide to start scouting other jobs online, or look for a training program for another career.  Not have enough money to go back to school?  I can choose to deliver pizzas on the side, or offer myself as a babysitter.



If we feel over-scheduled as a family, I can choose to say 'no' to extra work, or extra-curricular activities, or family events.  

We have this amazing super-power, yet we somehow forget this awesomeness--repeatedly!

The point of this rambling is: if something isn't going how you would like it, CHOOSE SOMETHING DIFFERENT!  It sounds so simple, yet we make it so difficult.  It's not.  I promise. 

Right now, you have the choice to keep trolling around Facebook, or go schedule that next adventure, or book a massage, or sign up for that class, or tell your mother-in-law 'no', or kiss your husband…or or OR...???

The choice is yours.