Coaching Corner Series: Strong Women

"Women listen. Women want to do it right. They want to be perfect but also understand that it takes time, and they are willing to put in the time to make it right. Women respond well to corrections, and they have no egos when it comes to weights. There are no preconceived notions of what they are supposed to do.  They come in fresh and ready to learn. They get excited to try new things. Their confidence intensifies."  Emily Socolinsky gives a rundown of what a strong, confident woman looks like to her as a coach.

Emily should know, since she's the owner of Five X 3, a Starting Strength gym in the Baltimore, Maryland neighborhood of Fells Point.  Her ware-house space is based in an up-and-coming area that may be a bit gritty on the outside, but it's all heart and sweat on the inside.  It's a place you know you won't leave without a lot of hard work.  

She exudes authenticity and authority that's hard to deny.  

To arrive at this unassuming warehouse--which churns out such positive results for so many women--Socolinsky has fought her share of battles.  After a long and successful run as a professional dancer, she was forced to resign in 2010 due to arthritis and herniated discs that caused excruciating pain.  This led to her exploring alternatives to her doctors’ recommendations for long-term physical therapy and a back brace.  Coincidentally, her husband was beginning a program called Starting Strength, which entails moving heavy weights through the standard lifts.  She was addicted from the start.  Her newfound strength has allowed her to rehabilitate herself to the point that she can not only coach professionally and compete in Strong Women competitions, but also can dance again.

Nowadays, Emily pays it forward to her members, the majority of which are female.  

She states that some women may come to her completely new to the idea of lifting their own body weight and more, but they also come with a can-do attitude.  They not only want to look strong, they want to be strong.  

Some women try to feed her the standard excuses, claiming "I can't lift that. Really?"  But Socolinsky, recognizing the female perspective, blends coaching and therapy skills to coax them into striving for what they are truly capable of.  They often surprise themselves.  "They look at me with this wide-eyed look, and then I know I have them hooked."  

"You have to give them a barbell and tell them, ‘Pick it up off the floor and then put it over (your) head.’ Seriously. You have to first show the woman that she can do this. You have to make her pick up a sandbag on her first day

and carry it across the floor. You have to make her feel successful the moment she walks through your door. You have to make her believe in herself by making her do something that she never thought she could do. 

You do this by

smiling at her, calling her by name, and telling her that she is strong--she just doesn't know how strong she is. You have to get her into a class with other women who look like her and are doing things that she does not think she can do. Women secretly want to do many things. They just don't know where to start."

Emily spent years going through the motions of what many women have come to view as the path to a healthy lifestyle: spinning, yoga, pilates, aerobics, and so on.  But when push came to shove, she realized she wasn't as strong as she had believed.  

Likewise, she encounters members who also struggle physically and mentally with similar issues.  One woman spent two years at another particularly pricey facility, and although she was working hard, she was unable to break through plateaus on a few fundamental move- ments.  Her confidence was waning when she came to Five X 3.  She’d avoid eye contact, sigh, and wonder why she was the only one struggling.  It's taken months of investment by Socolinsky to psych her up to a drama-free point in the weight room.  But now, this woman has come to the realization that she is capable of so much more than she thought, and Emily's hard work has paid off. It's this type of transformation that fuels Socolinsky to keep giving it her all.

"The ladies who are confident in the weight room--and in their lives--walk taller. They laugh a lot. They coach each other. They walk into the room, and you can tell they mean business. They smile. They joke. They are not afraid to talk to you or look you in the eye. They carry themselves differently than women who are not confident in their abilities. These women know what they are capable of doing. They are humble, too, and they cheer each other on like nobody's business. They speak loudly. They never whisper. They talk about their eating. They EAT! They are not afraid to try something new. They never back down from a challenge. And they like themselves. You know they do because they dress how they want to dress--not how someone thinks they should." 

An upside of training women is their focus on wanting to do something perfectly, but Emily warns this can also be a limiting factor.  Women tend to aim for perfection, which is inevitably impossible.  This leads to frustration and, at time, tears.  It's in moments like these that she taps into her female perspective to supplement her coaching techniques.

The weight room becomes so much more than a place to build muscle and strength.  It becomes a place to build a community of like-minded, able-bodied women.  The support you are infused with, just by entering a space like this, is intoxicating.  

Emily has compiled a touching list of members' testimonials, sharing how they have benefited from their training at this humble warehouse--both physically, and non- physically. You can find these in her blog: http://fivex3.com/2012/07/09/empower-yourself-ladies-use-a-barbell-part-i/. 

They may enter uncertain, 

but they most definitely leave 

Strong Women.

Emily’s credentials include: certified Starting Strength Coach, AFAA certified, USA Weightlifting certified Level 1 Sports Performance Coach, and cycle certified through Madd Dogg Athletics. Emily holds a Master’s degree in Education and a Bachelor of Arts degree in Dance from the University of Maryland at Baltimore County.
She also coordinates a Strong Woman competition of her own, just outside her gym on Aliceanna St.  It is held annually and consists of fun, advanced, & professional groups.

She finds other ways to pay it forward, such as her continued support of the Susan Cohan Colon Cancer Foundation.  The Strong Woman serves as a fundraiser to donate to this cause, which hits home personally for Socolinsky and her family.  You can find more information and donate by visiting: http://www.firstgiving.com/susiescause/the-3rd-annual-charm-city-strongwoman-contest/fundraisers